THE Oscar After Party

There are three things we look forward to at the Oscars; the main Oscar red carpet, the award winners being who we don’t really think deserve it  and most importantly the Vanity Fair Oscar party. Everybody doesn’t get to attend the Oscars but everybody who is anybody gets invited to the Vanity Fair Oscar party. The guest list boast of people from supermodels to actors, of course. Last year’s party had some really bold fashion moments and fun moments like when Jennifer Aniston lifted up Emma Stone. That was gold. This year the celebrities did not disappoint. There is barely a reason for this review because everybody brought their A red carpet game but that doesn’t mean we don’t enjoy praising people who do good.

Top Picks

These are the ladies who in my humble opinion took our breathe away last night.

Zoë Kravitz wore an Armani Privé Spring 2015 cutout gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Zoe Kravitz gave the most romantic look I have ever seen her do. Zoe is known as the flower child who is always edgy but tonight she showed us a more romantic side. In this beautiful Armani Prive gown nobody could take their eyes off her. Even tho the hair and makeup also followed this romantic vibe there is also that underlining edge that is the fabric of who Zoe Kravitz is and I loved it.

Jennifer Aniston wore a shimmering black Atelier Versace gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Jennifer Aniston darling! I am obsessed with this look. It is simple. It is chic. It is the quintessential red carpet dress. Just enough glamour and sex appeal to catapult her into the best dressed of the night. Even her shoes are perfect.

Janelle Monáe wore Alexandre Vauthier Fall 2016 Haute Couture to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Janelle Monae I would like to thank you for giving me a moment. A FASHION MOMENT! This dress is perfect for occasion. It’s Alexandre Vauthier and I love the way it looks on her. Her second red carpet dress that night and she is still killing it. The shoes bother me but the dress is beautiful enough for me to ignore it.

Ruth Negga wore an Oscar De La Renta Fall 2017 embroidered dress to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Ruth Negga people is one of the people who takes risks on the red carpet. She understands herself and her fashion. She has her finger on the pulse. This dress was seen just this season on the runway of Oscar de la Renta and already she has it on the red carpet and serving it like it’s not next season’s ensemble. She then paired this beautiful dress with silver shoes. I would have never thought it would work but that’s why I’m not Ruth Negga. She is beyond when it comes to fashion and I just adore her.

Sarah Paulson wore a Ronald van der Kemp Spring 2017 Couture gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Sarah Paulson just gave a whole new meaning to color blocking. A two color dress done so beautifully by Ronald van der Kemp, not van der Woodsen. A mustard and black dress with mustard as the dominating color is so visually polarizing. I adored it. I think she looks the youngest she has ever looked and it’s just her season to shine and she is doing just that. J’adore.

Karlie Kloss wore a red Naeem Khan Fall 2017 gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Naeem Khan is a master of dressmaking. He makes the some of the most beautiful dress, of which some have already hit the red carpet tonight. Naeem Khan and Karlie Kloss can only be described as a match made in heaven. Karlie Kloss and anybody is a match made in heaven. She has the body to make everything look good. Even a potato sack from the supermarket looks good on Karlie Kloss.

Alessandra Ambrosio wore a red Ralph and Russo Couture Spring 2017 gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Regally Alessandra Ambrosio. This Ralph and Russo dress is actually giving me all the life I need. Everything about the dress is perfect. The style, the fabric, the red color and the draping. I am in love with an angel. A Victoria Secret Angel.

Mariah Carey wore a Philipp Plein Spring 2017 gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Say what you want about Mariah Carey but there is no disputing that it is Mariah‘s world. I like this Philipp Plein dress and even better, I love it on Mariah Carey. She did not come to play with you hoes. The slit is high and the neckline is low. Mariah Carey looks happy and radiant on the Vanity Fair red carpet. Mariah Carey has been quiet fashionable recently and it’s good to see her going back to the Mariah we love.

Viola Davis wore a custom Brandon Maxwell suit & Stella McCartney shoes to the Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Let me tell you why I love Viola Davis‘ outfit. It is a white Brandon Maxwell pants suit that has been paired with the best accessories; a Stella McCartney shoe and an Oscar statue. Do I need to say more? I don’t think so. She was beautiful the whole night and I was living for every look.

The Others

Now that the best has been separated from the herd, let’s get into the rest or others as I have written above.

Rooney Mara wore a custom H&M Conscious midi dress to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Another woman who knows how to serve an intellectual fashion moment is Rooney Mara. How did she come out wearing a custom H&M and look better than some of these girls that came in high end labels?

Kerry Washington wore a custom Michael Kors copper sequin-embroidered gown to the Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Kerry Washington has been making more daring fashion choices recently and I appreciate it. There has been a whole lot of texture in her recent red carpet looks and this is another beautiful textured gowns. Is this the most beautiful gown she has worn? No. Is its one of the best looks that night? No. Does she look gorgeous in this Micheal Kors dress? Yes.

Alicia Vikander wore a custom Louis Vuitton Spring 2017 open back gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Alicia Vikander looks beautiful and classy in this Louis Vuitton open back dress. I like the fabric but I don’t like shoes that are above the ankle under a dress. It always looks off if I see a long strap thru a slit.

Felicity Jones wore an embroidered Erdem Fall 2017 gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

I honestly don’t know who Felicity Jones is but this embroidered Erdem gown has me asking, “Who is she?” I am intrigued to know more. This is a beautiful dress and I love it.

Emma Roberts wore a vintage Armani Privé gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

I love this new Salem feel Emma Roberts is giving. The pale skin and red hair is working for me. Another thing that is working for me is this dress. This vintage Armani Prive dress is simply divine. The whole look came together perfectly.

Michelle Monaghan wore a Brandon Maxwell Fall 2017 black cutout gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

You can never go wrong with a Brandon Maxwell dress on any red carpet. They are regal, beautiful with a touch of sexy. That is what Michelle Monaghan is giving us right now.

Sofia Vergara in a custom Michael Kors gown & Joe Manganiello in a Zegna tux at the Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

I think people are sleeping on Sofia Vergara and  Joe Mangeniello. They are a power couple. Maybe it is because they haven’t done a lot of red carpet together but when they do they look amazing. This metallic Michael Kors gown is beautiful. She has been moving away from mermaid silhouette she loves for red carpets and it’s working perfectly. Goes to show that trying new things does help. As for Joe Mangeniello his Zegna suit fit like a glove.

Freida Pinto wore an Elie Saab Spring 2017 dolphin blue sequined gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Freida Pinto looks good in this Elie Saab dress but the middle part of the dress doesn’t look too flattering. If only it was cinched in an inch more or she stood in better poses then it would have worked better. The dress and color is beautiful.

Lily Collins wore an Elie Saab Fall 2016 Couture black embellished gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

I love Lily Collins in this Elie Saab dress. It is so pretty and she looks ready for a ball. What I love most about her look is the hair and makeup choice for the night. I love old Hollywood glamour and I love seeing modern interpretations of it. Her face looks like it was ripped right out of the society pages in the 80s.

Hailee Steinfeld wore a Ralph and Russo Spring 2017 Couture crystal gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Hailee Steinfeld is a lackluster girl. She doesn’t have that je ne sais quoi. This whole look lucks presence. It’s a beautiful dress and she is a beautiful girl but somehow this is not translating to star power. The pulled back hair with barely done face isn’t helping either. This is a neutral colored dress, that if we are being honest isn’t doing much, and you pair that with even more boring hair and makeup. She looks beautifully boring and I’m over it.

Emily Ratajkowski wore an embellished Jonathan Simkhai Fall 2017 gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Emily Ratajkowski. Another beautiful dress. Another beautiful girl. Another up do with barely any makeup on.

Rosie Huntington-Whiteley wore a custom Atelier Versace gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

If I was a fetus I would love to be wrapped in a metallic Atelier Versace gown. I barely noticed Rosie Huntington-Whiteley had a belly because the dress did a beautiful job at hiding it. She has that expecting mother glow and also simple hair and makeup. At this point I am beginning to think it is a trend. One that I don’t like to see on Oscar night.

Diane Kruger wore an Alexandre Vauthier Spring 2017 Couture dress to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Diane Kruger came ready to party. This is typical New York socialite look. A modern day Carrie Bradshaw? I think so. The Alexandre Vauthier dress was a beautiful choice and I loved it. It’s short and wraps the body in all the places you want your body to be wrapped around. I think Diane is ahead of this pack and she looks ready to party. I’m sure she did the “Formation” choreography when it came on.

Reese Witherspoon wore a Michael Kors Fall 2017 leopard dress to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Reese Witherspoon in this Micheal Kors dress is  literally making me yawn as I write this. A big hearty yawn. It’s a beautiful dress but it’s boring. Boring for the Vanity Fair Oscar party. It’s one of the biggest parties in the year and you choose to be safe today of all days.

Tracee Ellis Ross wore a Zuhair Murad Fall 2016 Couture burgundy gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Let me tell you what I don’t like about Tracee Ellis Ross in this beautiful Zuhair Murad couture gown. It gives me mother at brunch. I feel like she is about to call in the maids to bring everyone mimosas. Like the queen in Coming to America. She looks regal and beautiful but motherly. I think it is because of the the hair. It is just not glamorous enough. Uh I hate when my favs don’t come to snatch my bald. This is basically a slight breeze and my wig cap is firmly secured on my head.

Scarlett Johansson wore a black Azzedine Alaïa Spring 2017 gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Why is Scarlett Johansson wearing a jacket on that beautiful Azzedine Alaia dress? It is taking away from the beauty of the gown. Were you that cold that you couldn’t leave the jacket before hitting the red carpet? I am flummoxed.

Jared Leto wore a Gucci Spring 2017 reversible kimono + black trousers to the Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

I love that Gucci is paying Jared Leto enough money to have him wear beautiful, beautiful Gucci clothes on the red carpet. Keep him on the pay roll Gucci *wink wink*.

Nina Dobrev wore a Dior Spring 2017 gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Do you know what I don’t love about this dress, I have seen it so much. I have seen it at parties, on the red carpet and in magazines. With dresses like this you have to be able to bring something new to the look. This is a beloved Dior dress, so how can you take it from mass Dior to Nina Dobrev Dior. Hopefully that makes sense to you. I don’t know why I expected anything more from her. She stays boring.

Priyanka Chopra wore a Michael Kors Fall 2017 gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Here is Prinyanka Chopra also in a beautiful Micheal Kors dress. I think people are forgetting that Vanity Fair is about being sexy. It’s in the name, VANITY Fair. Being just beautiful doesn’t cut it anymore, you need to be drop dead gorgeous. When you are about to leave the house ask yourself this question, “Am I dressed to impress?”, the answer should always be YES!

Katy Perry wore a Jean Paul Gaultier Spring 2017 Couture bronze dress to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

So Katy Perry finally passed a rake through that ugly, messy hair she came to the Grammys with and this hair looks good on her. I like the color and the cut. However this dress is not working on her at all. It looks like it was meant to be left in the roar era. I don’t like the way it looks on her but I loved it from the Jean Paul Gaultier runway. I am still actively ignoring her new single.

Jessica Biel wore a Ralph Lauren Fall 2017 one-of-a-kind gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

I have a problem with Jessica Biel and I am going to speak on it. Why is she so boring?  She never does anything exciting. Even her marriage to Justin Timberlake is so boring. Ugh! Thinking about it makes me want to take a long beautiful nap. I don’t like this Ralph Lauren dress. Capes are so 2014, Lupita did it and we gagged. They had their moment and now they are gone. She needs to do something to make her more interesting or stay at home and take care of that beautiful baby she has.

Jessica Alba wore a light blue Ralph and Russo Spring 2017 Haute Couture gown 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Ralph and Russo is a brand that is highly praised by high fashion Twitter but is this just hype? This dress is pretty but it is nothing special, or is it that Jessica Alba  isn’t doing much with it? The whole look just isn’t pooping for me. It’s another beautiful dress.

Gabrielle Union wore a John Paul Gaultier Spring 2017 Couture gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

I love a revealing dress but this Jean Paul Gaultier gown is not working on on Gabrielle Union. I can’t believe I am about to type this but I don’t like this Jean Paul Gaultier gown. The colors are not working for me neither is the style. A long cloth on a bikini tied on the side. Everything including the shoes are not working. A complete fail on both parts.

Demi Lovato wore a lilac Monique Lhuillier Pre-Fall 2017 gown to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Demi Lovato tried it with this Monique Lhuilier gown. The dress is beautiful and she looks beautiful but it doesn’t feel like Demi Lovato. Her dress to the Grammys was better because there was an edge. This just looks like she is trying to be romantic and we ain’t buying it. Just like we ain’t buying that she is 1% African. Oh I hope that doesn’t make her think she can use the N word. That would be the straw that breaks the camel’s back.

Sia wore a custom Armani Privé Spring 2017 outfit to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

This outfit just like Sia‘s wigs have become a uniform for her and I am getting bored. If you don’t want to be seen by the public then stay at home. This whole hiding my identity nonsense you have going on is just annoying and we want it to stop Sia. Just STOP! The gag is we already know what you look like and don’t care enough to stop you in the street if we saw you. Why can’t you just make amazing music without all these gimmicks?

Toni Garrn wore a Jonathan Simkhai Resort 2017 hi-lo skirted jumpsuit to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

I appreciate what model Toni Garrn was trying to do with this dress but it just doesn’t work. It doesn’t look like it fits with the feel of the event. This would be an amazing Coachella outfit so I suggests she keeps it for then and rocks with the new headliner Lady Gaga.

Dakota Johnson wore a Gucci gown and clutch to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Dakota Johnson had a rough night. Not only was her red carpet dress horrendous, her after party dress was droopy. The pink bow on the dress looks like it needs a good ironing and so does the dress. I would suggest she cleans house and hires a whole new group to handle her styling and beauty. The people who are doing it now are failing.

Thandie Newton wore an Schiaparelli Fall 2016 Couture dress to the 2017 Vanity Fair Oscar Party.

Normally I don’t have one worst dressed, I have a couple, but tonight Thandie Newton fell so far behind the pack she took the crown. She is the worst dress on one of the most important nights of fashion. I hate the dress. The pink, white and gold shoulder pads going into a silver mini dress with a scaly metallic sheer fabric to the floor is just too much. Her hair and makeup also looks like she is on step 2 of a  12 step rehab program. The whole look is appalling. Please do better next time.

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